


Not like the fairy tales

by orphan_account



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Forced Marriage, Mental Breakdown, Soulmates, because Fili has duties as a heir, just a lot of pain, no happy endings here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-25
Updated: 2014-02-25
Packaged: 2018-01-13 18:29:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1236619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili is Fili's One, his soul mate. But Fili is the heir to the throne, and as the heir he is forced to marry someone else and have a child of his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not like the fairy tales

Fili deserved it. His jaw and cheek throbbed painfully but he didn’t tear his gaze away from Kili’s. He met his husband’s eyes steadily, his own throat dry, heart thumping loudly in his own chest. 

Slowly, Fili pulled his fingers into fists but he didn’t lash out. He had deserved the punch and wouldn’t be surprised if more were to come. This was merely steeling himself again. For the next hurt, the next pain.

Kili stood in front of him, chest heaving and eyes wild and looking so, so hurt.

Fili couldn’t find a reason for him not to be. Not when they would have to be separated. Would have to do so of their own free will.

“Kili. Kili, I am sorry.” Fili’s voice sounded hollow, even to his own ears. It shook a little and Fili cleared his throat, trying to get it under control again.

“But heirs are needed.” They’d told him, over and over again. Heirs and a proper marriage and someone of the right blood. Blood that wasn’t as close. He was king and people demanded it.

Fili had to do this.

“Our line must be continued.” It was an echo of the words repeated to him for the last years. The constant whisper in his ears.

“And I can’t do that with you at my side.”

Kili shook his head in denial, not wanting to hear it. Of course he had heard of it, but he had thought with Thorin knowing of their bond, that he would not have to tell Fili to go and do it.

To have a child with someone else.

To marry someone else.

Tears were stinging in his eyes, heart breaking in his chest to the point of not being to be healed again.

Because he was losing Fili. He was losing him to a woman he didn’t know, who was royal and good enough for Fili to marry.

To spend his life with.

And Kili would be left behind, a whisper in the wind, a mere memory.

"Sorry? You’re sorry?!" Kili was near hysteric now, fingers clenching on a fist that he wanted to connect on Fili’s face again.

"Sorry will not cut you leaving me behind! For marrying someone else and having their child! For leaving me here to be your brother and nothing else!"

He lifted his hand up. “And don’t you _dare_ start to tell me that I will always be your One. That? That doesn’t matter anymore. Nothing matters anymore.” Kili whispered tears sliding down his face freely as he lifted his hand up.

With shaky fingers he removed the ring, removed the bracelet that Fili had given him and let the empty promises fall on the dirty ground.

It was all the anger Fili deserved. It was all the anger Fili was going to take, all of Kili’s rage and the disappointment and the heartbreak. Fili would accept it all with open arms because it was something. It meant his One still seeing him. Not ignoring him and considering him unworthy of attention.

But if Kili’s words and actions were anything to go by, this would be the last time they would see each other truly, for what they were. After this parting, they would only be Kili and Fili anymore.

If they were any of that and not even less.

"I’m sorry," Fili repeated, trying to keep his voice even. He bent down, scooping up the ring and the bracelet, holding them tightly in a hand. It would be all he’d have left after their parting. All he would have left of Kili.

"And you are my One. If it pleases you to know, this isn’t easy for me either. None of this is. None of it ever will be." Kili would most likely leave. To the lower halls, to Dale or Mirkwood or Ered Luin. To so many places Fili wouldn’t be able to reach anymore.

Where had it gone so wrong?

"I love you." But he had duties. Duties that needed attending to if he ever wanted to be a good king. Thorin had been lucky enough that his sister had given him heirs but Fili… He loved his own brother. There was no way one of his siblings was going to birth him an heir because there was only one. Only One.

"I love you so much, Kili."

"Don’t!" Kili snapped as Fili just continued talking, saying words that made the younger one feeling like he was suffocating, dying away.

Because that was what was happening to him.

He was nothing without Fili.

Just the Prince. The one causing mischief and trouble to others.

A half of him would be missing and they knew it, yet they forced this upon them.

Kili covered his mouth with his hand, trying to keep the sobs from escaping him as he turned his back to his brother, not wanting to see him anymore. He had no idea how he would pull through his, how he would be able to continue his life after this.

He had heard of dwarves dying when they lost their One, their half.

He sort of wished it would happen to him too.

"Go."

The single word was raw and broken and the young prince shook his head. “Just go. I can’t stand being in your presence anymore.”

If dwarves could die of heartbreak, Fili would be sure to follow Kili. Because his own heart was breaking into tiny, fractured pieces in this very instant. Kili was sending him away. Well, no. He had sent Kili away first. He had broken Kili’s heart first. And Fili needed to take responsibility for it.

Fili closed his eyes and slowly pulled off the ring and bracelet Kili had made for him, too. His wrist and finger felt bare without them and it took time for Fili to finally place them gently on the ground.

He couldn’t bare to see something Kili had worked so hard on marked by a fall.

For a few seconds, Fili lingered. He wanted to take Kili and run away. He wanted to be free of the responsibility of being Thorin’s heir. He wanted… He’d only ever wanted to be with Kili.

And he was going to deny himself that simple pleasure.

Making a wounded noise, Fili turned around and slowly walked off. He couldn’t even hold his head up high. He felt a century older, felt old and rotten and thin like paper.

As soon as Kili stopped hearing Fili’s steps on the ground, could no longer feel his presence with him anymore, the dwarf’s legs buckled underneath him and he crashed on the ground with a heartbroken wail.

It was a cry of lost love, cry for help, a cry so desperate it felt like the air itself had stilled around him.

Kili cried, not caring if his face was wet with tears, if he was dirtying the tunic he was wearing or if someone would walk by and find him.

Because Fili had just walked out of his life, had walked out of his heart leaving him cold and hollow, gasping for air that he couldn’t get.

Fili was gone, his brother, his One was gone for good. They were nothing anymore, they were the same as two strangers to each other who would nod if they met and that was it.

No more laughing, no more stolen kisses, no more nights spent together in bed.

He was briefly aware of suffering from a panic attack, his fingers clutching his chest as he sobbed and hiccuped, curling on his side on the ground trembling.

The last he saw was the blurry image of the ring and bracelet glinting on the ground before everything went blissfully dark and he felt no more.


End file.
